I Want A Natural Childbirth, But I’m Open To…

Doulas have heard this a hundred times: “I want a natural childbirth but I’m open to the possibility of getting an epidural”.  Labor and Delivery nurses read it on birth plans thousand of times.  

I leave myself open to… the possibility…

This opening can go both ways – it can lead your clients to triumph in moments of doubt and crisis or it can lead them to surrender to the fear and ask for an epidural. 

This opening is where the coaching conversation begins. Coaches in many different fields, such as executive coaching, career coaching, relationships coaching, or lifestyle coaching are searching for this opening. And yet we, birth support professionals, are handed the opening so explicitly. This is our cue to begin to coach. 

How do you engage the client in a powerful, life-changing, and results-oriented conversation, and not miss this amazing opportunity, this opening? How are you going to lead a coaching conversation with this expectant person or birthing individual who ‘leaves themselves open?’ Aren’t you curious to learn about the source of their hesitation – what is interfering with their ability to fully commit to their desired birth experience? Wouldn’t this be valuable to your support process if you understood what is the nature of the circumstances that will make them turn their back to plan A – having a natural childbirth, and choose plan B- asking for pain medication?  

Leading a coaching conversation around clients’ mindset

Aren’t you curious to learn about the source of their hesitation – what is interfering with their ability to fully commit to their desired birth experience?

You will engage in a powerful conversation that will help reveal and clarify the beliefs, values, challenges, and perspectives. This conversation may impact the decision-making process of that individual.  And this is how you lead them closer to their desired experience. They are now closer to what they want to experience and to how they say they want to feel. When you begin to verbally coach expectant people, you begin to understand the nature of what they are open to or the nature of the possibility that they leave themselves open to. You begin to fully understand what might interfere with their healthy and positive transformation. And most importantly – they discover and understand it.

The nature of this possibility is a mindset that can be shifted when we recognize it, and as transformational birth coaches, we help produce a better mindset. How is this new mindset better? It is more supportive of this person’s visions and wishes and is getting them closer to their desired experience – having a natural birth. 

How do we coach this client?

The transformational industry is the second growing industry in the world right now. You can be a part of this awakening. As birth professionals, it’s only natural that we join this industry so that we lead and support with transformative strategies that match the utmost transformation our clients go through. As birth support professionals all that we want is to be supportive and valuable throughout the utmost transformation in people’s lives – giving birth and becoming parents. With transformational coaching strategies, we can be successful in doing it even virtually. 

I’m curious about the nature of this possibility in which you’ll ask for an epidural.  What do you see happening that makes you ask for the epidural? 

This is what we teach in the yearlong program to become a Transformational Birth Support Coach at Birth Coach Method. So when our graduates hear this opening or others, they are jumping into juicy and life-changing conversations with their clients. 

  • “Do you recognize that this is a mindset? Tell me more about this mindset of openness, what is it that you leave yourself open to?“
  • “I’m curious about the nature of this possibility in which you’ll ask for an epidural.  Can you try to close your eyes and describe the possibility? What do you see happening that makes you ask for the epidural?” 
  • “How is being open to getting an epidural serve you? Is it strengthening you in some way? Does it give you comfort? In what way?” 
  • When you leave yourself open to the possibility of asking for an epidural, does it bring you closer to having a natural childbirth? 

There are so many beliefs, perceptions, values, background stories, fears, life circumstances, lifestyle choices, and challenges taking part in the childbearing journey. These can support expectant, birthing people and new parents in having their desired and positive experiences. But many times some of these beliefs or background stories can function as success blockers and interfere with the experience by impacting people’s mindset and decision-making process. That’s why I strongly encourage you to learn how to lead those powerful coaching conversations.

After you explore your mastery level, decide what the next steps are for your growth and consider joining our upsoming workshop.

To help you find out your level of mastery in leading birth support conversations, I created an assessment tool that you can download.  After you explore your mastery level, decide what the next steps are for your growth and join our program. Coach your clients, virtually or in person, so that they can conduct themselves beautifully throughout their childbearing experiences. Coach them so that they do not need to rely on your hands-on or physical engagement from moment to moment. Transformational birth coaching is the pathway to evoke the parent in them and lead them to take charge of their life experiences. 

Photo by alevision.co on Unsplash

Neri Life-Choma
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epidural, natural birth, prenatal coach

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